Episode #6 - Life KPI'S & Defining Your Purpose With Patty Morrissey Of Cultivate Club
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Description
In our 6th episode, Kerry interviews Patty Morrissey who is the founder and head coach at Clear and Cultivate, a Konmari consultant, and was dubbed a guru of tidiness by the New York Times. In this episode, we talk about defining your purpose, prioritizing yourself, The Konmari Method, and what Life KPI's are.
About Patty Morrissey
Patty Morrissey, MSW is the Founder and Head Coach at Clear & Cultivate and creator of The Clear & Cultivate Method™. Patty believes our homes should "Spark Joy" and that our own definition of success is the only one that matters.
An obsession with personal development and furthering the common good is the thread throughout her dynamic career in social work, higher education, tech startups, philanthropy, and consulting.
Patty applies her experience in clinical social work to unpack both the physical and emotional stuff that's getting in your way so that you can become the person you are meant to be.
In 2016, she became one of the first certified KonMari® Consultants in the world outside of Japan. She is the Senior Instructor for Marie Kondo and KonMari Media Inc., teaching workshops and consultant certification courses from NYC to Hong Kong. As a lifestyle and organizing subject matter expert, Patty was dubbed a “Guru of Tidiness” by The New York Times, a “Magician” by CBS This Morning.
Beyond work, Patty volunteers in her community, runs a Little Free Library outside of her home in Huntington, New York, loves to frolic in the woods and swim in the ocean. Of all of her titles, Mom is the one she's most proud of.
Show Notes
Instagram | @pattymorrissey | @joincultivateclub
Website | joincultivateclub.com
Book: Getting Things Done by David Allen
Transcript
Kerry Finsand: 0:10
Welcome to Successfully Depressed. And I'm your host, Kerry Finsand And it's time to learn about how to navigate mental and physical health in life and business. Today's guest is Patty Morrissey. She has a master's degree in social work. She's the founder and head coach at clear and cultivate and the creator of the clear and cultivate method. Patty believes our home should spark joy. And then our own definition of success is the only one that really matters. In 2016, she became one of the first certified Konmari consultants in the world outside of Japan. Patty was dubbed a guru of tidiness by the New York Times and a magician by CBS This Morning. Welcome to the show Patty.
Patty Morrissey: 0:52
Kerry Thanks for having me.
Kerry Finsand: 0:54
I like this you're a guru and a magician. Uh, just a Renaissance woman, I guess. Right?
Patty Morrissey: 1:01
Uh, I'm curious about a lot of things and yeah, you gotta grab those little one liners when they give them to you in the media. So it, yeah. It's fun.
Kerry Finsand: 1:11
We both worked together at Groupon many years ago. Um, I was based in, in Oregon doing outside sales and then marketing, and then you're based in Chicago. Um, tell me a little bit about that position to kind of you're what is it like director of social innovation?
Patty Morrissey: 1:28
Yeah. Well, it was, we were there at Groupon during its heyday when it was skyrocketing. I think it was dubbed the fastest growing company of all time. And so it was an incredibly exciting time to be there. And Groupon was originally a platform called the point and the point was a collective action fundraising website. Before Kickstarter was Kickstarter. Actually the founders of Kickstarter got their whole tipping point model from the point. And my job, I was hired by Andrew Mason and the founding team to make sure that the social justice intentions of The Point remained alive through the company as it was becoming Groupon. And so I actually was working on The Point at first and I said, it doesn't make a lot of sense to have one employee over here in the corner working on the point. Why don't we use the, the fuel of this fast growing company. And I was really the founding head of corporate social responsibility or what we called social innovation. Cause that's kind of the, the buzzword of that industry at the time. And, uh, Developed all of their fundraising efforts, employee volunteer program. Um, I initiated some of the environmental sustainability efforts, but the campaign I'm most proud of there is the love local campaign, where I did a lot of public speaking and awareness raising internally to help the company and its leadership really understand and embrace the role it had in shaping, growing, nurturing, supporting local economies through its work with small, independently owned businesses.
Kerry Finsand: 3:11
Yeah, that's great. It's slowly coming back to me now. I was trying to do some research cuz I don't even remember all the things that I did back then. I do know that we talked a little bit about when I was creating a role as community manager for Groupon. Um, I saw as an opportunity and I was trying to reach out to all the different departments. So I'd talk to you. And I talked to people, designers like pretty much people from kind of touchpoint of every department to kind of understand like how this role could connect to everything together. And, um, Ended up having this position come out called community manager to help support local. Because at the time in Portland, we were getting some bad press. Willamette Week, like one of our like local, you know, newspapers and on the cover of it, it had Calvin and Hobbs and under Hobbs, I think there was a steaming pile of poop that said Groupon. And it said, title headline, poop on Groupon. And there's this like all this bad press around them. And I was like, you know, it's, it's too bad because it's a very good platform. But early on, I think Groupon didn't know what they were doing. And I think also customers didn't know what they're doing. So it's a balance, you know, like some restaurants that could hold 20 tables of people. Oh, I wanna sell 10,000 Groupons. Is not sustainable. So, uh, I kind of created a role to help actually do seminars in the community for businesses kind of help 'em get the most out of it. And it was a great experience. And then from, uh, one of the things that you were involved in, it was they had with, with the point, what was that called again? Like we had this whole campaign that was continuing all the time. Was
Patty Morrissey: 4:48
group on grassroots.
Kerry Finsand: 4:50
Yes. Groupon grassroots. That that's what it was. So, um, what I did is I played off of that and I'm a big craft beer fan. And so I created my own holiday called Portland beer day, which is really every day in Portland. Uh, and, um, we raised like over $2,000 for the Glen Hay Falconer scholarship, which gives scholarships to people on become professional brewers. So anyways, so like that's kind of my story and kind of, kind of briefly into kind of what you did and kind of learning from some of the things that happened and, uh, I have to say it was just a, a great place to meet people and you know, 10 plus years later, you know, we're talking now,
Patty Morrissey: 5:30
Yeah, no, it was such a good experience, such an exciting time to, um, be a part of all of that growth and, and change. And I feel like what I do sort of, uh, there's a common thread from my whole story and, and the way I, I support individuals in organization and, and it's really just trying to get to the heart of the matter of like, what, what are we supposed to be doing? What makes us come alive? What is this company's purpose? And what's the individual's purpose. And if we can align with that, then, uh, good things are gonna flow from there, right? Instead of trying to have a group on foundation or a, all these sort of other things, these tangents, why not just make the core product good. And so I, I help individuals sort of design a life in the same way of just let's make your life inherently joyful instead of drudgery and then joy on the weekends. How can we just integrate, um, who we are and, and our life's purpose, more seamless.
Kerry Finsand: 6:36
And so you have, you know, you had the passion to help people and you had the passion of learning. So tell us a little bit about your, your background and kind of how you got to where you are today.
Patty Morrissey: 6:47
Yeah. Um, well, you know, to, to sum it up, I guess I always wanted to change the world and make a difference. And I think a lot of that for me, uh, service is, is very healing. So even through my own sort of life struggles and challenges and traumas, I always found, um, if I could focus on supporting other people, it really put my own challenges into perspective. So that's kind of how I'm wired, how I've always been wired. Um, I remember being a little girl at sleepover parties and whenever there was like little girl drama, I'd be the one to gather us around a circle and find common ground. And so it's no surprise that doing group work and facilitation is really. Where, uh, I'm, I'm happiest. And so through all of the, you know, different steps along the way in my career, I've just trusted the flow of life. Um, and, and trusted that call. And you know, now that I'm turning 40, sometimes I ha I'm like, am I still doing this right? Should I should, is it time to adult and do the responsible thing and go get a job with a pension at a bank or something, but I am just, you know, just having faith that things always work out. And so Steve jobs in his Stanford commencement speech has this quote, you can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking back. And that has, has really guided me. So, you know, in, in undergrad I studied psychology and, um, was involved in, you know, the campus Assault hotline and did some volunteerism. There went to grad school for social work and, and helped the fraternities and sororities there. Um, I created a, a service learning program. Um, got a lot out of that. I interned with a sex therapist, which was really exciting and, and interesting, met a good friend through that training. Um, and then I started my own company at a grad school. So the work I was doing with the college students, I realized that service is such a powerful tool for bringing people together. So I had a team building company where I brought, um, com corporate groups, and even like children's groups, school groups together, and I would organize days of service for them. And so I was doing that, but, you know, entrepreneurship, it was challenging. So I also had a day job at an employee assistance program and that's. When I found out about the Groupon opportunity and I was brought in and they really were excited about all of the nonprofit relationships that I had already established through my company and the fact that I was an entrepreneur. So they knew that they could just sort of give me an objective and that I would, I would be able to work independently and, and be adaptable in that environment. And that was five years. Um, I had a baby and got married and, and then I felt like Chicago, my forever home. And I moved to New York that where I'm originally from, um, and worked as a director of training for a crisis hotline. And in that time there, you can imagine, uh, the, how stressful that environment might be with the content of the job, but also the pressure. Um, there was a lot there. So that's where I developed, uh, sort of a self management and team management tool that I called life KPIs to help my staff of trainers avoid the burnout. That's so common in those kinds of intense helping professions. Um, and ultimately it, it was best for me to do my own thing while my daughter was young. So I could have full control over my time and be there for her and get her to and from preschool and participate in all the things that are so, so, uh, you only get to experience them during that, that little window where your babies are little and now she's, and now she's turning 11 in a few days and I'm ready for my next thing.
Kerry Finsand: 10:39
That's great. When you started off as a kid and you're basically starting kind of a group counseling back then you were destined for this, it's always fun to hear people's story kind of like when they were kids, what they were doing, what they wanted to do, and sometimes it's complete opposite now they're they don't have those interests. But, um, I know for a lot of people, like when I was a kid, I had little businesses Like we did a kid's garage sale. Where we actually charged our neighborhood kid, friends to sell their stuff at our garage sale.
Patty Morrissey: 11:10
You had like a vendor fee.
Kerry Finsand: 11:12
Yeah,
Patty Morrissey: 11:13
Funny. I think that, that question of what did you love to do or what comes easily to you know, to, to take a look back on childhood, that's a good, thing to look at. And so when I was in this job, um, commuting two hours each way to the city and feeling really stuck in that place, um, I made a list of things I wish I could get paid to do. And, and this was inspired by my friend who an entrepreneur, Saya Hillman, her business is Mac and Cheese's productions. She's in Chicago and she helps people do what she calls live a life of. Yes. And I've always admired her, followed her work. So I, I followed her her example and just made this list. That seemed ridiculous. It was things like, I wish I could organize playrooms and color code and have a post-it and Sharpie collection and lead retreats and, uh, shop at garage sales. It was just the silliest list. And now that's that's, my life is, is doing all those things on that list.
Kerry Finsand: 12:16
So you basically, you kind of manifested it into existence.
Patty Morrissey: 12:20
Yeah. And, and it, cuz if you're, if, when you take away all of the, the pressure of what culture says you're supposed to do, and you get really honest with like, what. Really makes you happy and what sparks joy in your heart. Uh, you'll find a way cuz that's really what you're supposed to be doing. That's that's what I believe. And now that I've really designed my life around this spark joy concept or Saya calls that live a life of yes, I use the language of aliveness and if you're true to that, aliveness things just have a way of working out. Um, but there's so many different texts. I read a lot, I probably read at least two books a week and whether you're looking at business books or spirituality, books, philosophy books, um, I read a, a broad range of things and it all comes down to that. Like what are you, what lights you up? What are you supposed to do? And, um, and good stuff comes from there. It, a lot of suffering comes from denying that.
Kerry Finsand: 13:27
Yeah, that's a good point. I definitely am beginning into reading a variety of spiritual books and business books, everything lately, and yeah, they all kind of, they say it different ways, but it's kind of always the same kind of meaning and just, you know, different kind of, kind of different take on it and everything. So that makes a lot of sense with learning all of all this about yourself and what you like to do. I wonder right now what's your next phase? I know you already have Cultivate Club. What are your goals with that?
Patty Morrissey: 13:52
Yeah. So cultivate club is really a culmination of my life's work. It's a women's empowerment group. Uh, sometimes I call it a self care sorority, although it's, you know, there's no fraternity basements and exclusion involved or hazing or any of that, but it's just a, the most supportive group of women. Um, one of my clients calls it the mothership of support and it's for people who are really committed to personal growth and change and, um, need support and are wanting to give support. And so that group is online. It was launched during the pandemic. Um, and we practice the clear and cultivate method that I created. And it's, it's incredible. So that will continue. I have, uh, I've trained coaches. I have a program manager, so it's really kind of running itself now. And I'm more of the, you know, walking the halls as the founder. And so that's a really fun role to have in it as, as a member of the community, but I'm not responsible for the day to day of it. Um, but also one of the things that I, that I was really kind of blindsided by, cause I, I enjoy the flexibility that comes with running an online business, but I found myself, um, malnourished when it comes to in person interaction. I'm a single parent. I work from home. Um, and so I don't think I'm the only. Struggling with that. And so I'm piloting right now, Cultivate Club Local, and we just, we've just, we've already had two meetings on Monday night, we went roller skating together and I'm doing what I'm doing online, but now a local chapter model. So the online program will continue to exist and that's like the signature core program. And then the local ones, it's, it's kind of like the red hat society for the modern woman. Um, and I'm trying to give people that sense of consistency that like church or Bible study, or even like an AA meeting or the PTA meetings used to provide the Lions Clubs and these sort of social groups that are now either too specific to a religion or a recovery group or a stage of life like nursing circles and trying to create a space where any woman wants to come and feel more connected and have more community. And we meet, meet up twice a month. And so, uh, I think beautiful things are gonna arise out of that, but I'm not putting any pressure on it. I'm doing it for myself to pilot it and then I'll upgrade a toolkit and, and launch that globally as well. I already have people who are interested in, in doing that and that'll be, um, more affordable. So I'm always, when I'm thinking about innovation, I'm always I'm. I also think about pricing innovation, cuz what I do, I wanna lower the barrier to entry. It needs to be paid for. I have staff and expenses. Um, but this model takes a $4,000 a year program and turns it into a $100. A year program. So I need volunteers and people who want to take on a local leadership role, um, to, to organize these groups, just like you would a book club or something, but instead of reading a book, we're, we're practicing this method of, of personal growth together. So that's, that's my focus with that. Um, and then I'm exploring sort of I'm, I'm, it's kind of like a gap year experience. I wanna find a local organization that, um, could use my help and I wanna commit to them for a year or two kind of like I'm thinking of it almost as like a local Peace Corps to get me, you know, nourished again on that social interaction that I need. And then I'll continue to do cultivate club. And I also do trainings for Marie Kondo still, and companies hire me to do. Talks on life KPIs and lunch and learns and consulting and all of that on the side. So my coaching and consulting training business is very flexible. And so I'm looking for something, um, in person that really speaks to my soul that I can support.
Kerry Finsand: 17:59
Yeah, I can definitely relate to that. Just kind of being around people, you kind of get that energy. And, um, I know for me, uh, the like boot camp gym by my house. Uh, the pandemic unfortunately killed it and it was just great group of people. And it was literally like a two minute walk from my house. So it was like the best of both worlds and stuff. And so even something like that, you know, I think that the last several years of the pandemic, we've all lost a lot of community and, you know, talking to people like this is great. Uh, but also in person, you know, that's, that's even, that's even better. And, uh, I, I like the idea of you doing this on, on a local level and something that you're kind of test piloting and, and make, and also, you know, to make it something that's affordable. I think that's really, what's hard for a lot of people where, you know, they may, maybe they want, they want like a live coach or a mentor and they can't afford it. Um, this is also like in healthcare, maybe they need a counselor and, and that's another whole nother thing too, where not everyone can afford things. And so the more, uh, The price point is something that's affordable for people. The more it benefits everybody. And, and hopefully in society, we can, you know, be more peaceful.
Patty Morrissey: 19:12
Yeah. And, and some people, you know, can't afford it and some people don't prioritize it and. Target demographic. They have a hard time prioritizing some themselves. That's a big thing of what our work is, is involved in it. So I've gotten a lot of feedback that once they've signed up for the program, I'm talking about the core program. That's, you know, that's a significant investment. That's really a big shift just right there before they even start the program is they'd be, they become someone who's put themselves last to really taking a, a serious, um, making a serious commitment to themselves to make this investment and commit for a year to be with us through this growth experience. And it, it kind of like breaks the seal for them because after my program, then they're signing up for all kinds of stuff. And they realize that when I, when I make the investment in, in myself, I get the return on investment. Um, whether it's, you know, Obvious in terms of their business growth and there's an immediate ROI there. Um, but it saves them a lot of it saves them years of pain and struggle and suffering. Um, people are saving their marriages and saving their families. They're healing a lot of stuff. Um, and so my program is kind of a generalist one, one stop shop, and then people will go on and realize like, oh, I could really use a relationship therapist or I could really use a coach to help me with my finances. And so then they go on and, and do that. But at the local level, you know, it's, it's a good gateway. So I have been kind of looking for that initial, um, easy yes. That people can, can make, to start investing in themselves and start showing up.
Kerry Finsand: 20:54
Well, I think there's a couple things. One is that sometimes you might have the money, but you just have to figure it out. Like maybe you cut costs somewhere else. Like you cut, you cut your cable. Or I had a friend that was like, oh, you spend how much money a month on this, on this bootcamp, gym, this bootcamp class. And I'm like, well, it's not that much money. I'm like, you could go to the bar less and you could afford it yourself. You know? It's like, it's all what people value money, different ways, you know? So that's part of it. But what I like about what you're talking about is the momentum. And I feel like when you're around the right people, you're getting that momentum. So it's all about the situation that you're putting yourself in. So if you're people that are always, you know, negative and stuff and don't believe in you, or don't believe in themselves, it can be more of a challenge. But if you're around people that, you know, Are wanting are believe in themselves and wanting to help others. And just in a pubs space that at it attracts like the negative energy attracts negative energy positive. And I've been noticed that myself in this last year, too, just like certain things, like, why am I on social media now? I'm like in this weird mindset going like Facebook doom scrolling or something. So it's um, yeah, we have to be more cautious of kind of our, our decisions and, where we want to be.
Patty Morrissey: 22:08
Absolutely. So what you're talking about there is, uh, in social work, there's a there's. Uh, a thought around the person in environment. So you're not just like taking a person out of context, you have to like view their situation more holistically. And so I start with the premise that like your whole perfect, good as you are. Let's just manipulate the environment that you're in. And so whether we're literally mean like the home environment, like through the organizing process or the people that you surround yourself with, that's a big element. And so when you think of yourself as like a little acorn or a little seed, and you just think what would be the most nourishing environment to put myself in that's where we're tr that's what we're trying to do. The other thing is during the change process, often the people who love you the most, who really do, they do love you. They do care about you, your spouse, your parents, your kids, your best friends, um, in a family system like that, you play a role. And when you change, even when you change for the better, it really disrupts that system and people, um, consciously or not. Will sabotage your growth because it threatens everything for them. It's like, oh, mom wants to go to work out in the morning. Well, how am I gonna get to school? Or, you know, oh, my wife is gonna, you know, be more attractive and then she's not gonna be attracted to me. And then that threatens my connection with her. And, you know, so, or, you know, it's, it's, it's that kind of thing. Or when you start getting healthier and then people feel bad about themselves, cuz they're making poor choices and you didn't tell them that they needed to change, but just your betterment makes them feel bad about themselves. So then they just demean you. So it's really important when you're going through a change process, especially in the beginning to find a tribe of people who are doing that as well and, and practice that with them. They're not gonna, they're not gonna sabotage you. The other thing is that if your connection. to a group is dependent on you remaining the same. You're not gonna change because belonging is one of those base level needs. You know, you've got physiological survival, and then you have belonging. So your higher level, you know, growth and actualization. Um, you're not gonna pursue that if you're belonging needs are threatened. So in cultivate club, we fulfill that like you are connected, you belong. So a lot of times the work that we do strengthens people's relationships, but sometimes they realize the people, the person I married to, or the friends that I have, they're not as supportive as I thought they were and they start to deteriorate, but we hold them while they're rebuilding their new relationships locally in that process. So it, it is, I. Whether you join a cultivate club or a group like ours to find, and that's kind of why AA exists because you're, you're, you can't stay friends with the, with the guys at the bar anymore. If you wanna change your change, your life.
Kerry Finsand: 25:18
Yeah. And that's where you're talking about earlier about kind of the changing your environment, you know, it helps change your life. And I think that's a good segue into the, um, the Konmari Method. And I just have a note here that I like the definition of what it's about, but it says when you reassess your belongings and organize your home, you set the stage for a huge transformation. This is a magic of tidying. So this sounds like it's kind of an idea of, of changing the environment and getting momentum. So can you maybe tell us a little bit more about that program and how you got into it and you know what it's all about.
Patty Morrissey: 25:52
Yeah, so the Konmari Method was created by Marie Kondo. She's a Japanese organizing consultant. She now lives in the US in California with her husband and her three kids. And, um, and so she has an army of consultants. I was one of the first and now I train consultants on how to do this method, but I've also, uh, worked with clients and have I'm a master level consultant. So I've gone through the process myself and I've worked with, I dunno, many people to help them go through it themselves. And it's a comprehensive tidying process. And I think people are originally drawn to it cause they understand that they have too much stuff where they feel cluttered. And then they initiate that process. For me the result of having a beautifully organized aesthetically pleasing home is like the icing on the cake. But the real weight and impact of the process is that you have to get really clear on where you wanna go, what your vision for your ideal lifestyle is. And then you have to learn how to make decisions for yourself. So I think the big outcomes of the KonMari Method are that you learn to trust your instincts. You learn to express gratitude for what you have and you learn to let go. And these are all things that are just good life lessons, but what's so powerful about the KonMari Method is that you are actually tangibly doing this. So you're holding an object up. You're making a decision. Is this worth keeping in my life or not? Yes or no. You're letting your body kind of, you're learning that, that in that deeper level intelligence, it's not an intellectual decision. It's really that, that kind of deeper inner heart, knowing that gut, heart kind of feeling, and you're just making decisions around t-shirts right. And you do that through every object that you have. Now, you have the practice of how many objects do you have. Thousands, tens of thousands in your home, by the end of the process, you become, you're a very decisive person. You really understand what you're about, what you're not about, what sparks joy for you, what doesn't. And so then when you're faced with bigger life decisions about what you should do with your career or who you should date, what you should do with your marriage, if relationships feel good or not, should I move across the country to pursue this opportunity? You'll know like, this is such a hell yes. Kind of feeling for me. Um, because a lot of those true hell yes, opportunities are often not what culture wants you to do. So to be brave in life, you have to have that like strength. Inner strength know that like, this is so true for me. So the Kamari method is just like applied meditation. It's like a, it's like a training ground for developing your intuition and your decisiveness.
Kerry Finsand: 28:42
Okay. That's interesting. I didn't know a lot about it. And I've, I watched a little bit of, one of the episodes on Netflix of that, that she has talking about things and you know, it's kind of hard for people to let certain things go. My wife is very, very organized and more of a, a minimalist. I'm not pac-rat, but I definitely like to keep things. And for me, it's like I might need that someday. It's not necessary. I'm usually not attached to much of it. Maybe a few things like, my shirts from college that I had, like my fraternity shirts are something random that I had. I'm like, oh, I still have those. I don't know why I don't really need them. So you're basically saying, okay, we can start with something that's a physical thing and something that's tangible in front of us. And then we can leverage that into the the rest of our lives and how we make decisions moving forward.
Patty Morrissey: 29:26
Yeah, it's it just, you kind of develop your muscle around that decision making and with ideas, it's really easy to collect them and let them pile up. And we don't, you know, there's unlimited storage space for ideas. So we think like, why not just hold onto them all, but they drain us just as much as like the stuff that's clogging our, you know, our closets and under the bed and all of that. And it's a David Allen who wrote getting things done, talks about it, like mental Ram, another author, the book is, um, the Mayo clinic's guide to stress-free living. They talk about like open files and the more open files you have the slower you're gonna go, the more stress you're gonna feel. So when I'm doing the KonMari Method with people, I say, we're just gonna, the reason clutter feels so heavy, it's not just like that. It looks heavy, but every object is like an obligation. You know, that book that you're keeping on how to brew beer is sort of an obligation to learn how to brew beer. And you're like, okay, that was like a fun idea. Seven years ago, I'm done with that. Now I'm gonna release it. Um, and sometimes there's a casualties, you know, we get rid of things and you're like, dang, like I wish I kept that, but that does not happen very frequently. And the letting go of those items really opens up space for what is yours to come in. So you have to let yourself navigate that empty space. And I often use the example of like a trapeze. So where I am today, I'm standing on a platform, maybe I'm holding onto the bar. And sometimes I leap because what's on the other side is like very clear and very enticing. And sometimes I leap because the platform I'm on is crumbling and I need to let go. And whether you are jumping out of, you know, excitement or jumping out of fear, you can't avoid this middle space where you're just in thin air. And we don't like that feeling. We wanna feel grounded. So it's important and you're gonna jump more easily if you have less weight on you. So we don't wanna, we don't wanna have a lot of old baggage when we're going into the next stage. So I do a lot of blank slate kind of exercises, um, and kind of, I, I just broke my wrist. and that is forcing the like, okay, I, I cannot afford to do things that aren't really critical, that aren't really essential. And so it's this prompt to declutter my to-do list, declutter my ideas and only do what's essential. And I think even after this heals, I'll hopefully retain some of that and keep working lighter and faster because of it.
Kerry Finsand: 32:24
Yeah, maybe it's also something where you've just been really busy working on your business. And now you have that moment to kind of reflect and say beyond just healing my wrist, what are other things I can work on that I've been wanting to do for a while that aren't business related, um, that just kind of for taking care of myself. So what are some things you like to do to kind of take care of your kind of mental and physical health?
Patty Morrissey: 32:47
Yeah. Um, well I read a lot, I really enjoy reading and learning and connecting, but I, I live by a set of life KPIs. So whenever I'm feeling off, uh, I'll take a look at my dashboard and usually, you know, I'm neglecting something. And as soon as I start to work on that and give it more of my attention, I feel a lot better. So. Uh, for me, relationships matter a lot. Community matters a lot. So a lot of my life KPIs are about other people. So I have walks in nature. That's a huge one for me. Um, visits with friends, date night and, uh, new experiences because I love learning. And so even like, I've never broken anything before, so I'm like, okay, new experience check. That's a PO it's a positive, like I haven't ever experienced this before. Interesting. Um, and, um, and the other one, what did I miss? Oh, service service to others. Yeah.
Kerry Finsand: 33:46
So it's kinda like, it's kinda like Maslow's hierarchy of needs, like some of the, the basic things that we need to kind of survive, um, kind of based off of that maybe a little bit, or
Patty Morrissey: 33:56
Well it was really just an exercise. When I thought about, you know, I'm a hundred years old looking back on my life. How do I know it was a good one?
Kerry Finsand: 34:06
mm-hmm
Patty Morrissey: 34:07
I let the movie. Sort of the ideal movie montage play out. And those were the themes in my life. It's a life that's like a life of service, a life of deep, meaningful relationships and a life where I continue to learn and grow every step of the way, um, and a life where I was connected to myself and connected to my truth. And that's the, the woods is my, is the place where I, um, feel the most connected to myself.
Kerry Finsand: 34:35
Well you need to come out and visit, uh, my wife and I and come hike out in the Columbia River Gorge. It is beautiful. I dunno if you've been there, have you been.
Patty Morrissey: 34:43
No. And so I'm on Long Island where like it's wilderness with a lowercase w um, when I'm in like wilderness with a capital w it's a little terrifying, cause it's like, oh, you can really get lost out in here. Um, but yeah, guided hikes, hikes with friends, like check, check.
Kerry Finsand: 35:00
Yep. Yeah. Just getting in nature. That's what my wife, like, she's in the banking world, but for her, she knows that yoga, she does yoga several times a week that works well for her. And then she loves kayaking
Patty Morrissey: 35:14
Mmm.
Kerry Finsand: 35:14
kayaks year round and that's like her passion. And I know if I, like, if I said, oh no, this weekend you can't go kayaking. Then it's like, then that's her joy. She needs that and everything. You have to find what you really enjoy doing everything.
Patty Morrissey: 35:28
Absolutely. And I love how you say that because it's not a one size fits all. Everyone has their own thing that is joyful and nourishing to them. And if you know that about your partner or your team at work, your boss, your employees, your children, then you're going to encourage them to pursue those things. And they're gonna come back a better. A better version of themselves, um, to be in relationship with. So we wanna encourage that my, my boyfriend loves to surf, so same yeah. Year round. It's his thing. And he has to do it.
Kerry Finsand: 36:01
In New York. It's gotta be pretty cold then.
Patty Morrissey: 36:03
It is, he has all the gear. Yeah.
Kerry Finsand: 36:05
okay.
Patty Morrissey: 36:07
yeah, he has all the gear.
Kerry Finsand: 36:09
Yeah. That's uh, that's like with her too, she has the gear to do stuff in the wintertime and I think that's great. That's what she wants to do it, but I'm like, you know, there's pictures of her, like with Iles and her helmet and stuff, I'm like, wow, you're, you're really hardcore into this stuff. And, uh, that's great. That's what, you know, that's that she loves it and everything. So, um, so that kind of leads the more into the kinda life KPI. So, um, From from the cultivate club, maybe you can kind of talk a little bit about, um, you know, if someone wanted to get into involved in the cultivate club, um, how would that, how would that work basically? And right now it's only for women. I'm not sure if you're gonna have, does women, just your niche. If you wanna expand to men too.
Patty Morrissey: 36:50
Yeah. Well, I I've heard from men that they, they wanna join and they wanna group for them. Um, and so I'm open to exploring that if someone wants to raise their hand and, and get trained as a coach, to coach a men's group, we cuz the tools are, you know, they work for everybody. Um, but you know, the vibe that we have right now, it's, there's, there's some, something special about, um, having a women's group, but that's a, that's been something I've thought a lot about like, should I have coed? Should I not? And how should that work? Um, and right now I think. Um, for the women to feel like they can fully be free in how they're talking, that it works, it works this way. Um, you know, I've even gotten requests to have a curriculum for kids or for, for teens. So, you know, one thing at a time is kind of how I, how I'm approaching it. Um, but if people wanna join, they, they simply go to join cultivate club.com, fill out an application. It's open enrollment year round. Although we do do a big enrollment in January. And so people join us for the entire year. It's a year long commitment, but, uh, I've decided not to fully close the doors in case someone's like, I really need this right now. I'm not gonna make them wait six months. Um, before giving them the access we do have, we do sell out though. The, the program closes at 50 members. That's the model that I have right now. Um, but the local groups, I will be opening that up and that won't have a limitation if anyone wants to. Be a local chapter leader. Um, I don't even have information available about that yet on my website, but they can still just go to the join cultivate club website and, um, and just send us a little note through there and, and we'll get them on the list for that when we start offering the trainings.
Kerry Finsand: 38:38
What would be for somebody? I know we kind of just talked about Life KPIs a little bit, but what's kind of the high level process. What is your philosophy for that basically?
Patty Morrissey: 38:47
Well, why first with Life KPIs, first thing I want to sort of convince people to do is that it's worth tracking your own definition of success, especially in these times that we live in because culture is keeping score already and things like. Comparison on social media or professional comparison or things that people have and own. And you're, you're you comparing yourself to other people, isn't something that you can control. It's just something that you are wired to do. And so we have exposure now to so many different people all over the world all the time that it's, um, it's really hard to get off that hedonic treadmill. And so if you know that, well, I know myself, this is, this is what makes me happy. This is what makes me thrive. It's important to just have your little checklist, your scorecard, um, so that when you, when that comparison does bubble up and start to affect you, you can take a look at, you know, the values that you're living by and people, you know, they have core values, they have their personal goals and things, um, but values can be really vague. And so life KPIs takes it a step further. And instead of just living virtuously, you actually have a score and you can see it going up or down and you can start to see trends of well, when I'm feeling this way. Um, if these indicators are there, it's a pretty good indicator that my life is moving in the direction that it should. Um, and then if someone's living their life in a different way, you say good for you. I have a different scorecard than you. Um, and, and there's mutual respect in that as well. So it's really useful for self as a self-management tool, but it's also useful as a, as an employee management tool. So a lot of companies right now are trying to figure out how do we, um, create a culture that supports everyone's individuality and honors everyone's individuality and uniqueness. Um, but you know, is fair. so we need this, like one size fits all kind of policy, but then we need to make it available to everyone on their individual preferences and needs. And so life KPIs, I think, you know, and this is experimental. I'm working with some companies now to see how this is gonna play out for them, um, is really honoring what everybody's individual priorities are. So if Kerry, you know, your life priority is, um, learning new things, then as a manager, I can help you achieve that by giving you new projects to work on. I don't have to give you a raise. I don't have to give you more time off. I don't have to like buy all these incentives. I just need to know that you're driven by newness and to give you learning experiences, whereas maybe one of your colleagues, um, really wants time with their kids. And so when they request Fridays off in the summer, then I honor that because that's, what's driving, that's, what's driving them. And so the process is really simple. The, when I invented it, it was, it was modeled after Ben Franklin actually. So this isn't, um, this is an old idea. Ben Franklin used to carry around a little notebook and he would check off how well he adhered to his 13 virtues that were his 13 is a lot to track, I think. So I try to encourage people to choose three to five things that are most important. And that's your little dashboard. And I just went through this exercise on the train. That's really out of desperation and identified some big buckets like mental health, physical health relationships, personal growth that were key to me for other people. It might be adventure, travel, creativity. It might be, um, You know, financially successful, it might be achievement oriented. And from those big bucket areas, we don't just say, I wanna be someone who's, you know, committed to personal growth. What does that actually mean? And for me, my metric is new experiences. Um, some, some of my clients, they count sunsets at the beach or number of creative projects that they do. I have someone else who has tea time every day, and those are the things that they wanna make sure that they're checking the box on.
Kerry Finsand: 43:27
I think that makes sense, cuz yeah I think you and I are similar in the fact that we wanna help people out and we both are, wanna learn and we're curious people and I just started this week, um, set a goal for myself to, uh, give myself of like 30 minutes a day of learning something new or 30 minutes a day and or of doing something creative. And so that's why I'm kind of working in my schedule instead of just being so like rigid where I have to do all these things And, and because I, you know, sometimes you kind of get into zone, like even like editing the podcast, like sometimes like one day, that's all I'm doing, but it's not really, it's better to do a little bit every day, at least that's, that's what I'm trying to do now. So try, I've been doing that myself, like just kind of looking out, okay. What, how do. How does this fit my needs and everything and, and making sure that every day I get this creative stuff, because doing certain things like editing and stuff, isn't always as creative. And then versus like, I like using Canva and designing different graphics for things I'm working on. So it's like, that's kind of my fun time
Patty Morrissey: 44:27
Mm-hmm
Kerry Finsand: 44:27
Then figure out, your own personal manual. Like one of the best times a day, you can do things like for me, the things that are more brain intensive are the first half of the day. The second half of the day is more like the creative stuff.
Patty Morrissey: 44:39
mm-hmm
Kerry Finsand: 44:40
I do. You kind of look at things that way too?
Patty Morrissey: 44:42
Yeah, there's a flow, a flow to it all, but the way I use life KPIs, it it's different than like I don't have a target every week. I generally like there's a dose that feels. Good, but I don't feel bad if I, if they go down. Um, I mean, I don't, I don't like beat myself up about it. Like I didn't hit my target, but I just take it as an indicator of, oh, I need more attention in this area and I make time for it. So I do a weekly planning process at, you know, typically Sunday night, sometimes Friday afternoon. I look at the following week and before anything else gets scheduled, I try to schedule the life KPIs in. So the date night, the time with my daughter, I try to think, oh, I haven't seen friends in a while. Let me make sure to, and then, and right there in the spot, I'll text a few friends that I wanna see. Um, and new experience. Sometimes that's something I plan for. Like, I signed up for goat yoga the other day and took a goat yoga class. And sometimes it's more of just an openness to new experience. And so I'm kind of open all the time. And so when you know, life presents an opportunity and someone's like. Do you wanna go dance in the rain? I'm like, yeah, of course, if we're gonna do that because that's new and, and exciting. Um, the nature walks, I certainly plan in my schedule and then everything gets fit in around that.
Kerry Finsand: 46:07
Yeah, I like that idea of, of kind of putting your, yourself your, your personal priorities first and then working those in, because a lot of times we do the opposite. We're like, what are all the things I have to get done this week? And it becomes this like never ending checklist and it gets kind of overwhelming and everything. And to look at that perspective and take, let's make sure we actually plan these things into the week so that we just don't forget about 'em.
Patty Morrissey: 46:33
Well, whether you're self-employed or you work for somebody, a lot of people operate from this place of, well, when the work is done, then I get to, and the work is never done. that doesn't exist. I mean, unless you're making widgets and after a hundred widgets are made, then you're done. But I, none of us, a lot of us are in that. And especially if you're in a creative field, which a lot of us are, um, we're, it's just about ideas and execution on the, those ideas and perfecting on the ideas. It's just a never ending process of invention, you know, uh, building and polishing. And so we do need to put some boundaries around that. And so I say, you know, uh, my day didn't happen until a nature walk happened and
Kerry Finsand: 47:29
Hmm.
Patty Morrissey: 47:31
you can get stuck in Google docs and email land for a long time. Um, and life KPIs, trains you to realize that not only is it acceptable to step outside of that, to. have the visit with a friend or go on the nature walk. Um, but that your work is actually better off for it.
Kerry Finsand: 47:53
Yeah, you recharge yourself. Your mind can only process so much. And I know that things I've been learning about lately is that we can only make so many decisions in a day and we get decision fatigue. Just like, you're talking about like the open tabs on your, on your windows and your computer, um, then never any list, things like that. If you look at it that way and, and you don't take the necessary breaks, then your mind just is not gonna work as well. And then you're kinda spin your wheels, then you're trying to get something done and you never get it done. Or it's not really that great.
Patty Morrissey: 48:25
Yeah. And when you think about, you know, if 200 years ago when someone was working on, so. there was no distractions. It was just whatever was in front of them. And they had the limitation of like daylight and stuff to, to deal with. And there was just a natural pull. Nature was nature, was creating a rhythm for you around that. And so you kind of asked about like energy levels, but I also think there's like a cyclical aspect of this in the day in the year, but there's also, um, different micro seasons of life that I think we need to honor. And so there is, I, one of the micro seasons is parenthood and parenting a young child. And so I really appreciate how fleeting this is. And there'll be a time later where I can grind a little bit more. Um, but. when given the choice of turning towards my daughter or turning away from her, I turn towards her and my work suffers for it. And I'm okay with that. We have to make trade offs. Um, but I get less done. I'm not winning any awards for the fastest to respond to email. I frustrate a lot of people because of that. I'm sure. But in life you have to be willing to disappoint people, um, and life KPIs, make sure that you're not the one that's being disappointed in the pursuit of trying to please everybody else.
Kerry Finsand: 49:53
I like that you're setting boundaries.
Patty Morrissey: 49:55
Big time. Yeah.
Kerry Finsand: 49:57
Well, that's just a lot of great tips there. I want to ask where can people find you online? Learn more about you.
Patty Morrissey: 50:03
Yeah, so I am at pattymorrisey.com. Joincultivateclub.com. LinkedIn is probably the social media platform that I'm spending the most time on, although not much at all. Uh, Instagram @PattyMorrisey and @joincultivateclub. Um, not super active on those, but I have a little micro presence on there, but yeah, email hello@pattymorrisey.com as well.
Kerry Finsand: 50:30
Well, Patty again, thank you for your time. And always like to end my show with you're not alone in life or business. Take care of everyone.
Patty Morrissey: 50:38
Yeah. Good message. Thanks Kerry.
